A Teen's Guide to the Conversation Game
Talking is important. Sure, we all talk, but some converse with others more easily and effectively.
How do they do that?
This is a book about talking. It's not about making speeches or doing formal presentations.
Think about the ways words can turn acquaintances into friendships, or how words can make impressions that don't represent who we are.
Conversation with others is like a game. In this game, you can practice skills and get better, just like you can with any game.
This book is for you, and me, and all of us. I hope you enjoy it, and I'd love to hear from you.
Talking is important. Sure, we all talk, but some converse with others more easily and effectively.
How do they do that?
This is a book about talking. It's not about making speeches or doing formal presentations.
Think about the ways words can turn acquaintances into friendships, or how words can make impressions that don't represent who we are.
Conversation with others is like a game. In this game, you can practice skills and get better, just like you can with any game.
This book is for you, and me, and all of us. I hope you enjoy it, and I'd love to hear from you.
What is the Number One Skill Employers Seek?
Oral Communication Skills are critical for success in careers. The AACU survey of over 1000 CEOs and business managers noted oral communication skills were number one on employer's wish lists and critical for success.
"Good oral communication skills got the #1 slot among the 15 job skills that executives and hiring managers identified as very important in new hires. Eight in 10 executives and 9 in 10 hiring managers said recent college graduates really need good speaking skills when they come looking for jobs."
https://www.edweek.org/ew/articles/2018/09/26/speaking-skills-top-employer-wish-lists-but.html?cmp=eml-enl-eu-news1-rm&M=58622010&U=1453192
Some Book Reviews
I’m not even done with this book yet and I already love it! It is a wonderful resource for me to point families/educators to, as well as a great resource for my own daughter, and even me as I think about how I communicate with others! I love the examples that are used and the “real” way in which Knox explains why certain aspects of communicating are important. Even just the overall ease of reading (and relating to) it makes it worth reading. I already have several parents and educators in mind that I am planning on telling about this wonderful book! Laura and family
In this increasingly digital age, Kathryn Knox's book reminds us of the importance of good communication. In this book there are tips for conversing easily, conflict resolution, and starting new relationships. While the book is written with teens in mind, I also found it helpful for adults. It's a good read. RSquared
My mom ordered this digital book for me. I am a rather shy teenage boy and have difficulty starting conversations. This books helped give me strategies on how to start and carry on conversations. While I still have difficulty because I am shy, the book has helped me overcome my fear of conversation. NICO
Normally when I read books, I don't write to the author, but I felt very compelled to write to you after reading your book about conversation in today's world. As a fifteen year old girl, you can imagine it's difficult for me to have good conversation flow with people my age because everyone is in an awkward stage of life, and we just don't quite know what to say! But with this book, I'm confident that I'll be successful as a conversationalist going into my sophomore year, and I know I'll make a lot of connections this way. Thank you for writing such an insightful book, reading through it was like opening a long-awaited gift on Christmas morning! Now I can finally feel comfortable with myself and with others around me. Once again, thank you! (H.)
"I really wish I'd had this resource when I was a teen. Great insights into establishing friendships - there's funny parts too!" -Farris21
"In this increasingly digital age, Kathryn Knox's book reminds us of the importance of good communication. In this book, there are tips for conversing easily,conflict resolution, and starting new relationships. While the book is written with teens in mind, I also found it helpful for adults. It's a good read." - Rsquared23
"I had my son read the book on conversations and he loved it!" - Heidi
“I like how you can combine the simple strategies for different purposes and discussions. Like you can add compliments to expanding masking to talk about sincere compliments and how you handle those.” - V.
“One idea is to use specific strategies as part of little ‘just-in-time’ opportunities that arise so often. You can have a card with some of your favorite ideas for quick reference and a mini-teaching lesson right at hand!” - M.
"A Teen’s Guide to the Conversation Game offers many strategies to practice your everyday talking skills and very innovative ideas to use to improve on those skills. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this book and would highly recommend it to any teen or adult who is looking to get better at the Conversation Game." -S.
"I finally got a chance to get your book and while I’m not even done with it yet, can I just say that I already love it?! I keep thinking that it’s not only a wonderful resource for me to point families/educators to, but it’s a great resource for my own daughter and even me as I think about how I communicate with others! I love the examples you use, the “real” way in which you explain why certain aspects of communicating are important, and just the overall ease of reading (and relating to) it. Anyway, just wanted to thank you for the wonderful resource. I already have several parents and educators in mind that I am planning on telling about your book!
-Laura Archuleta
http://lorislolz.org/book-review/
A Teen’s Guide to the Conversation Game is a newly published book by a dear friend of mine, Dr. Kathryn Knox. It’s a book focused on every day conversation. We converse with lots of people all the time, but have you ever thought about how your words make impressions on other people and how your words are received? Our daily conversations are like a game and A Teen’s Guide to the Conversation Game talks about ways you can improve on your conversation game and enlightens us to some interesting statistics about talking.
Did you know that “We listen at over 480 words per minute, while we talk at approximately 120 words per minute.”? “People only hear about 25% of what we say”, because we use other means to communicate like our body language and vocal tone.
Have you ever encountered a challenging topic in your conversation? Well this book offers some valuable guidance on how to agree to disagree while conversing.
There’s an entire chapter dedicated to “Online Talking” which has become a huge part of how we communicate, whether by instant messaging, texting, e-mailing, or participating in threaded discussion. The online conversation can sometimes send a tone or message to the other person that was not the intended communication. This book offers some suggestions on how to better understand the feelings that can come into play during online conversation when those unintentional messages are sent.
“Do you know that most of us use fewer than 1000 words in our daily conversations?” Dr. Knox offers some creative tips on how to add more precise vocabulary into your conversation. And then there are those people we encounter who are difficult; the people who enjoy playing the blame game and love to get defensive. There’s some valuable guidance on how to deal with those confrontational conversations and moves to think about for the next time you find yourself in that situation.
Dr. Knox also touches on those traps we fall into while conversing, like not being truthful. There’s tips here too so you don’t deviate from your personal morals and values during that conversation.
Have you ever been a part of a discussion where you just didn’t have the background knowledge to partake in that conversation? I’m sure we all have at some point. This book touches on some things you can do when you find yourself in a discussion you know little or nothing about so you can still be a part of the Conversation Game. A Teen’s Guide to the Conversation Game offers many strategies to practice your everyday talking skills and innovative ideas to use to improve on those skills. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this book and would highly recommend it to any teen or adult who is looking to get better at the Conversation Game. (Lori)
Oral Communication Skills are critical for success in careers. The AACU survey of over 1000 CEOs and business managers noted oral communication skills were number one on employer's wish lists and critical for success.
"Good oral communication skills got the #1 slot among the 15 job skills that executives and hiring managers identified as very important in new hires. Eight in 10 executives and 9 in 10 hiring managers said recent college graduates really need good speaking skills when they come looking for jobs."
https://www.edweek.org/ew/articles/2018/09/26/speaking-skills-top-employer-wish-lists-but.html?cmp=eml-enl-eu-news1-rm&M=58622010&U=1453192
Some Book Reviews
I’m not even done with this book yet and I already love it! It is a wonderful resource for me to point families/educators to, as well as a great resource for my own daughter, and even me as I think about how I communicate with others! I love the examples that are used and the “real” way in which Knox explains why certain aspects of communicating are important. Even just the overall ease of reading (and relating to) it makes it worth reading. I already have several parents and educators in mind that I am planning on telling about this wonderful book! Laura and family
In this increasingly digital age, Kathryn Knox's book reminds us of the importance of good communication. In this book there are tips for conversing easily, conflict resolution, and starting new relationships. While the book is written with teens in mind, I also found it helpful for adults. It's a good read. RSquared
My mom ordered this digital book for me. I am a rather shy teenage boy and have difficulty starting conversations. This books helped give me strategies on how to start and carry on conversations. While I still have difficulty because I am shy, the book has helped me overcome my fear of conversation. NICO
Normally when I read books, I don't write to the author, but I felt very compelled to write to you after reading your book about conversation in today's world. As a fifteen year old girl, you can imagine it's difficult for me to have good conversation flow with people my age because everyone is in an awkward stage of life, and we just don't quite know what to say! But with this book, I'm confident that I'll be successful as a conversationalist going into my sophomore year, and I know I'll make a lot of connections this way. Thank you for writing such an insightful book, reading through it was like opening a long-awaited gift on Christmas morning! Now I can finally feel comfortable with myself and with others around me. Once again, thank you! (H.)
"I really wish I'd had this resource when I was a teen. Great insights into establishing friendships - there's funny parts too!" -Farris21
"In this increasingly digital age, Kathryn Knox's book reminds us of the importance of good communication. In this book, there are tips for conversing easily,conflict resolution, and starting new relationships. While the book is written with teens in mind, I also found it helpful for adults. It's a good read." - Rsquared23
"I had my son read the book on conversations and he loved it!" - Heidi
“I like how you can combine the simple strategies for different purposes and discussions. Like you can add compliments to expanding masking to talk about sincere compliments and how you handle those.” - V.
“One idea is to use specific strategies as part of little ‘just-in-time’ opportunities that arise so often. You can have a card with some of your favorite ideas for quick reference and a mini-teaching lesson right at hand!” - M.
"A Teen’s Guide to the Conversation Game offers many strategies to practice your everyday talking skills and very innovative ideas to use to improve on those skills. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this book and would highly recommend it to any teen or adult who is looking to get better at the Conversation Game." -S.
"I finally got a chance to get your book and while I’m not even done with it yet, can I just say that I already love it?! I keep thinking that it’s not only a wonderful resource for me to point families/educators to, but it’s a great resource for my own daughter and even me as I think about how I communicate with others! I love the examples you use, the “real” way in which you explain why certain aspects of communicating are important, and just the overall ease of reading (and relating to) it. Anyway, just wanted to thank you for the wonderful resource. I already have several parents and educators in mind that I am planning on telling about your book!
-Laura Archuleta
http://lorislolz.org/book-review/
A Teen’s Guide to the Conversation Game is a newly published book by a dear friend of mine, Dr. Kathryn Knox. It’s a book focused on every day conversation. We converse with lots of people all the time, but have you ever thought about how your words make impressions on other people and how your words are received? Our daily conversations are like a game and A Teen’s Guide to the Conversation Game talks about ways you can improve on your conversation game and enlightens us to some interesting statistics about talking.
Did you know that “We listen at over 480 words per minute, while we talk at approximately 120 words per minute.”? “People only hear about 25% of what we say”, because we use other means to communicate like our body language and vocal tone.
Have you ever encountered a challenging topic in your conversation? Well this book offers some valuable guidance on how to agree to disagree while conversing.
There’s an entire chapter dedicated to “Online Talking” which has become a huge part of how we communicate, whether by instant messaging, texting, e-mailing, or participating in threaded discussion. The online conversation can sometimes send a tone or message to the other person that was not the intended communication. This book offers some suggestions on how to better understand the feelings that can come into play during online conversation when those unintentional messages are sent.
“Do you know that most of us use fewer than 1000 words in our daily conversations?” Dr. Knox offers some creative tips on how to add more precise vocabulary into your conversation. And then there are those people we encounter who are difficult; the people who enjoy playing the blame game and love to get defensive. There’s some valuable guidance on how to deal with those confrontational conversations and moves to think about for the next time you find yourself in that situation.
Dr. Knox also touches on those traps we fall into while conversing, like not being truthful. There’s tips here too so you don’t deviate from your personal morals and values during that conversation.
Have you ever been a part of a discussion where you just didn’t have the background knowledge to partake in that conversation? I’m sure we all have at some point. This book touches on some things you can do when you find yourself in a discussion you know little or nothing about so you can still be a part of the Conversation Game. A Teen’s Guide to the Conversation Game offers many strategies to practice your everyday talking skills and innovative ideas to use to improve on those skills. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this book and would highly recommend it to any teen or adult who is looking to get better at the Conversation Game. (Lori)
Notes to parents and teachers:
"Employers in the 21st century economy need workers with people skills that enable them to communicate effectively."
"While development of social skills may be an important educational goal in itself (communication) is also logically related to academic performance." (Univ. of Chicago Consortium on School Research, June 2012)
Interpersonal qualities are included in recent research on academic success using non-cognitive elements of cooperation, assertion, responsibility, empathy, all expressed to a great extent through language.
This book supports the Common Core Standards and state standards for oral literacy and communication.
"Employers in the 21st century economy need workers with people skills that enable them to communicate effectively."
"While development of social skills may be an important educational goal in itself (communication) is also logically related to academic performance." (Univ. of Chicago Consortium on School Research, June 2012)
Interpersonal qualities are included in recent research on academic success using non-cognitive elements of cooperation, assertion, responsibility, empathy, all expressed to a great extent through language.
This book supports the Common Core Standards and state standards for oral literacy and communication.
- To become college and career ready, students must have ample opportunities to take part in a variety of rich, structured conversations—as part of a whole class, in small groups, and with a partner—built around important content in various domains.
- They must be able to contribute appropriately to these conversations, to make comparisons and contrasts, and to analyze and synthesize a multitude of ideas in accordance with the standards of evidence appropriate to a particular discipline.
- (They must be able to ) Prepare for and participate effectively in a range of conversations and collaborations with diverse partners,(formal and informal interactions), building on others’ ideas and expressing their own clearly and persuasively.
This podcast discusses how sometimes men have difficulty communicating. See what you think as you listen!